Routines « Perfectly Parker

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

I Take My Job Seriously

As the spokescat for my family, I would like you cool kitties to know that we all have jobs to do for Mommy & Daddy here in the Middle of America.

My sister, Puff was the first kitty to join Mommy & Daddy when they got married. Without going into a lot of detail in this entry, I'll just say she is a VERY good looking kitty. Her job is simple, she has to look gorgeous 24-7. And I have to admit, she is darn good at her job. Puff will be nine years old on April Fools day (how appropriate! Ha!), and she still loves to play and run around like her butt is on fire. We don't always get along because she thinks she is the Alpha cat, but I have to admit, I respect her place in our family.

My other sister, Powder joined Mommy & Daddy the same day that Puff did, but she was an "afterthought." I don't mean that in a bad way! Mommy & Daddy had only planned on one kitty, but when they saw her all itty bitty and scared and hidden in a bale of hay, they knew if they didn't take her she would be coyote bait and live a short, unhappy life. So, Powder came along and became part of their new, happy little family. Powder is meek and mild and skittish. Her only job is to keep Mommy's heart happy. And she does. Powder is pretty much a one-person kitty. That's OK, we all let her be, she loves to sit on her cat perch and gaze out of the window, all the while keeping Mommy's heart happy just by being her. Powder will be nine on April Fools Day *snickers again* (she really is Puff's biological sister).

My pesky brother Rudy has an important job as well. He is the patroller of the home. No bug is safe in this house! His other job is to play with our dog-brother, Diamond. They like to run around the house and wrestle. Rudy is a big man cat and he's fearless. The only thing he backs down from is Puff, who by the way, is Rudy's biological mother (Mommy & Daddy didn't know it, but Puff was already "knocked up" when they brought her home).

Last & certainly not least, is ME! I think you have guessed what my job is. I am the spokescat. I have the voice! I like to think I am the brightest of the felines around here. I have opinions! I have ideas! I have to go and find a sunbeam cause I am getting sleepy!

Have a very cool day & find a sunbeam of your own to nap in.
And, here's hoping lots of homeless kitties find their forever homes today!
Parker

Posted by Perfectly Parker at 10:01:04 | Permanent Link | Comments (2) |

Friday, March 09, 2007

Parker's Guide To Eating Breakfast On Time

As many of you cool kitties know, humans have thumbs and we don't. This places us at a disadvantage at mealtime. On our last visit to the evil V.E.T. Mommy was told that we were a little *ahem,* overweight. And the evil V.E.T. said that the wet food would be better for our teeth, something about carbs, blah, blah, blah....so the evil V.E.T. told Mommy to switch us off of our Science Diet dry food and start feeding us canned food. WHAT?!? CANNED FOOD!?! I thought that was great! We hardly ever get canned wet food! Hurrah! Just one little problem. We can't "free feed" anymore. Which means when I want a snack, I have to *shudders* beg my Mommy or Daddy for food. I find this beneath me. I have had to practice my pathetic, pityful kitty look complete with huge sad eyes. I have also had to establish a pecking order with my brother and sisters so my bowl position is optimum. But the worst part is breakfast time. I have to wait for Mommy and Daddy to get out of bed. Their idea of when to wake up and my idea of when they should wake up are two different things. So, after carefully considering how to get fed when I want to, I have devised a foolproof system that will get Mommy or Daddy up. Here's how it works;
1. Walk around on the bed and disturb my dog brother, Diamond.
2. Flop down with a great deal of force next to Mommy or Daddy's arms.
3. Pat Mommy or Daddy's cheek very, very gentle-like.
4. Repeat step three as needed.
5. If this doesn't work, pull out the big guns - your nose!
6. Take your nose (make sure it's very cold and very wet), and place it right up Mommy or Daddy's nostril!
I can report to all you cool kitties that I have employed the nostril method numerous times, and it has never failed to get Mommy or Daddy out of bed. I get fed (although, I don't get a lot of loving pats and scritches), and all is right with the world.
I hope this helps you kitties who have to wait for their breakfast!
Have a wonderful Friday, I'm off to inspect the back porch!
Parker

Posted by Perfectly Parker at 10:33:58 | Permanent Link | Comments (0) |

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Do You Have A Routine?

Do you have a routine that you follow? I do. I like to sit near Mom and Dad's head every morning and stare at them until they wake up. They enjoy that. A lot. When they get out of bed, I must lead them directly to the kitchen and remind them where my food is so they can open the can! Then it's time to eat, then it's time to groom. After I do all of that I have to patrol the house and check for anything that is new or out of place. Then it's time to go on the back porch and check out the wildlife. I'm not always allowed out there if the humans think it's too cold, or rainy, or snowy...whatever. Then it's time for a long, long nap. I enjoy the comfort of the human bed or, if the fireplace is burning, that's where you will find me. When the humans come home, it's time for a snack! Since the evil V.E.T. has me on a diet, I have to plead and beg pretty hard for treats. I hate having to do that! It's beneath me to beg, but hey, a gal's gotta eat, right? I can turn on the sad kitty face just as well as anykitty. After the humans eat, I assist in kitchen cleanup, just in case they drop anything , then it's snuggle and play time. After that, time for a long night of bed hogging and snuggling. It's tough being me! I barely remember my feral life, these humans of mine are pretty cool.